Saturday, June 20, 2015

I Climb For You

This morning I packed Mackenzie & Levi up bright and early and we headed for the foothills to participate in the 3rd annual Postpartum Progress' International "Climb Out of Darkness".
She asked me why today's hike was so important to me.

I told her that after she was born, momma was sick for a while and I needed some help to get better.
That, this morning we were going to hike for all of the mommas who need to know that it is okay to be a little bit sick but also need to know it's okay to fight back.
What I didn't tell her was that I was hiking for her. My warrior baby. I struggle to tell her this because I don't ever want her to believe that my postpartum depression was her fault.

But truthfully, she's the reason I fight daily.
She's the reason I write and share with other mommas and she's the reason I'm a voice for honesty and transparency.
I want to raise kids to have a voice and to speak truth and life over others who feel like their voices have been silenced.

So today, we hiked for all of the warrior families out there who are in the thick of the struggle. The mommas and the babies and the daddies and siblings too. And we celebrated the JOY that has come to our family. The joy we fought so hard to reclaim.
Mackenzie Leigh, some day I'll tell you ALL of our story. But for now, you just need to know that you were worth EVERY minute of my battle.
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* Postpartum Progress’ Climb Out of the Darkness® is the world’s largest event raising awareness of maternal mental illnesses like postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety & OCD, postpartum PTSD, postpartum psychosis, postpartum bipolar disorder, and pregnancy depression and anxiety. Climb Out is held on or near the longest day of the year annually to help shine the most light on perinatal mood and anxiety disorders. The event features mothers and others across the globe joining together to climb mountains and hike trails to represent their symbolic rise out of the darkness of maternal mental illness and into the light of hope and recovery. We currently have more than 150 teams in 44 states and 3 countries -- and it's not too late to join an existing team or start a team in your area if you'd like, or at least donate to a team in your area to show your support. 

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