Monday, November 16, 2015

Apple Frickin' Pie

If you bake nothing else this holiday season, please bake this.  This, is what we call in our home, Apple Frickin' Pie.  Yes, I'm sure I just offended some people there.  Don't worry, I'm still going to heaven. Jesus himself would even love this pie.  I plan to serve it to him someday when I get there.
But I digress, this pie is our family tradition.  We concocted it several years back when we began to celebrate September 1st as our annual Family Fall Day.  We make it every year and we try to serve it to as many people as possible.  I once read a quote on a bumper sticker that said, "Love people.  Serve them amazing food."  And when I serve this pie to friends and family, I know that I am doing just that. 
So friends, I give you -- Apple Frickin' Pie.
Part One
Start by taking a sip of wine.  Because, why not?  Then you'll take your diced apples, some flour (we use Your Home Based Mom's Gluten Free Flour recipe), brown sugar, a bit of cinnamon, apple sauce and vanilla and toss it all together in a mixing bowl.  Then you'll pour your mix over pie crust.  We use store bought pie crust because we're lazy.  And we have children.  And hey, the object is to get this pie into our mouths as fast as possible.  And making our own crust just slows that wayyy down.
Then stick that baby in the oven for 40 minutes on 375 degrees. 
Part Two
Take some flour, brown sugar, cinnamon and a pinch of salt and add it to a mixing bowl. 
Slice some cold butter and add that in.  You'll use a pastry cutter to create a crumb topping to go over your pie.  When your timer goes off, you are going to sprinkle this mixture over the top of your pie.
Then, you will put your pie back in the oven for another 35-45 minutes (depending on how fast the top begins to brown).  Nobody wants burned crumb topping.  Not even Jesus. 
Once out of the oven, let your pie sit for 30 minutes so that it has time to set.  Cut into slices and top with whipped cream and vanilla ice cream.  So much goodness right there.

And finally, serve a piece (or two) to a friend.  They will love you for it.
  photo signature_zpslh0qvxnv.png


  1. Hahaha step one had me rolling! This was too funny, and also made it seem super easy. I have never made a pie!! Can you believe it? I know.. So I may have to try this one. "Nobody likes burned crumb topping. Not even Jesus" ba hahahaha. Okay but seriously, what kind of apples did you use?

  2. I was already drooling before you even put it in the oven. Like I could have eaten the apples out of the uncooked crust! haha. So glad I read this. You are so funny and you definitely have a new follower :)